Welcome to the Future

The entire family, Mark, Linda and I, joined Dad in visiting Mom
yesterday.

We were at the nursing home for just less then an hour and while my
stresses had been building for a whole day before the visit, the
visit calmed me and gave me a peace that I had been missing.

Dad, just the other way around, he was so wound up by the end of the
visit that he just wanted to get out of the place.

Mom is sitting up in a wheelchair, she has a foam bridge across her
lap as a restraint and she has torn and pulled at the foam cover
until it is just a torn mess covered in a sheet. When she first saw
Linda and Mark and I walking down the hall she started to cry and was
so pleased to see us. Gave us hugs and was very warm and connected
off and on for about three minutes. Mark unlocked her chair and
pushed her up and down the hall while Dad spoke with the charge nurse
and got a copy of her care plan and prescription plan.

We all settled in the small "front room" with comfortable chairs and
music and a cage of parakeets. Linda commented later that facilities
like this need more stimulus like, more birds, fish tanks, big TV's
with nature pictures, anything to create quite stimulus for the
patients. Dad commented that such things would help Mom very little
since she had always left the room when he had the TV on at home.
This after her earlier confusion regarding wether the faces on the TV
were actually guest in her home.

So we visited and sat in a circle and Mom chatted in ten to fifteen
second topics that ranged from wanting a drink to many, many thoughts
that she would start and then would just leave hanging as she seemed
to forget what the beginning thought was that she started with. Mom
has no memory of her fall, her hospital visit, the ambulance rides, X-
rays or any discomfort. She said she has been walking up and down the
halls but actually has only taken a few steps with the therapist. She
interacted with Linda and I more then with Dad and it seemed she was
oblivious to him after her first greetings to him. He pushed just a
little to ask her "what is my name..." which she was not able to
answer. I agree with Linda that even though she has much trouble with
names she was much comforted by faces and voices that she does know
and remember on some level.

I thought the visit went very well. Linda wheeled Mom back to the
nursing station and left her there, fiddling with her lap sheet and
there was no emotion in parting. Dad has a very emotional response to
the parting and gets torn up if Mom tugs at him and says, "don't go"
OR "don't leave me here". None of that this time and I do not know if
it is because of changes, medication or just what.....

So, on to her medical assessment.

The cynic in me comments, "so this is the end of a life lived as a
vegetarian, vegan, no smoking, no drinking, one husband, plenty of
exercise, no weight issues, this is the results of a healthy life?"

Her medical plan is designed to address the following diagnosis:

Pelvis fracture
Wegner's Granulomatosis
Alzheimer's Dementia
Dementia with agitated features
Anemia, non specific
Renal Insufficiency, Kidney disease
Leg Edema
Osteopenia
Vasculitis in legs
Osteoporosis

Not such a nice list of problems and issues.

But she is in good hands, in a safe place and she is finally on
several "calming medications" that seem to be helping with her
previous extreme agitation.