I could not, did not recognize her. Looked around, she did not seem
to be in the room. Then an aid, who was feeding her, said her name, I
looked in that direction and there she was. Her face and skin are so
different from just months ago and oh so different from a year ago,
it is sadly amazing. It has been one year, this month, that she has
been in a nursing home.
What a lovely phrase, nursing home, sound homey.
While Linda and I visited with her, and spoke with her aid, she
seemed to definitely recognize both of us. Our voices and names
seemed to bring brief recognition to her and she cried. We sat in the
front lobby together for awhile, in front of the indoor bird aviary,
and from time to time she would try to talk or say things. I love
you, I want to go home, I want to go to heaven, take me with you, you
have not been here in a long time. After each comment she would lapse
into quiet.
After months and months of decline, her level of apparent recognition
was confusing. Clearly revived from her hospital visit, she seems to
have a new chapter ahead. She is hand fed, all meals, her care staff
are very careful with her feeding, trying to prevent aspiration. She
is up in a wheel chair, unlocked and able to move, according to the
aids, a surprising amount.
And when it was time to go, she hung on to Linda's arm and just did
not want to let go.